i have said just about everything i am comfortable sharing in regards to my ex and her abuse — which has amounted to be a fair amount. she has contacted me in the past to wave my hand and say “no, hey, that rape stuff actually isn’t true” after i blocked her and asked her to stay the fuck away, and i refuse to do that. so here we are.
it has been well over a year since i broke up with her, two years since i started dating her, and holy shit, i am still picking up the pieces from all the damage she dealt to me. sex is a terrifying fucking prospect to me at this point, because my first experiences have involved coercion, objectification, and my sexuality being publicized with nothing in return.
the prospect of her still lurking around makes me physically ill, and the idea that people have decided to call all 15+ claims to abuse and harassment honestly scares me quite a bit. i can only beg those people to please, please be careful around her — she is venomous and manipulative with a horrifying angry streak. abusers do not change, particularly ones that have a nasty history for falsely claiming to “get help”.
if you make the active decision to continue associating with her, i really cannot stress the fact of how harmful it is to claim she is a sweet and innocent flower and calling her victims liars. even if her victims consented to sex in the past, that does not somehow invalidate the fact that she coerced (the fucking definition of rape) and forced them into some sort of sexual act. saying otherwise is on par with the ideal of a wife keeping her legs spread for her husband because she owes it to him. really not cool.
the #featnickiminaj tag and every subsequent has proved to be a sort of grounds for her victims to not only vent, but to give others the chance to fucking block any mentions of her. please do not take that away from people.